The day before Yesterday

I know its only been five days since I last posted, but so much has happened its unbelievable. First of all Sunday was my birthday. I turned 19. Yippee for me. However, 19 isn't that exciting, you don't earn any new rights. Its really not any different than other birthdays, unless you're me. Yeah.....so. I woke up to be in a friends film project, which isn't to weird. Then I was being a bum. Yes, a bum, or transiant, or vagrant or homeless, or whatever you want to call them, but I was playing one. Me. That is weird. I don't even owm jeans with holes in them. It was the most amusing thing ever. I'm sitting in a doorway outside my dorm in my friend's (male friend) torn and beat up clothing with a sign that said "will work for beer" I don't even like beer. So I was curled up on a store front just outside my dorm, looking like a bum, and a bunch of people I know kept walking by. That was fun. Then the other girl in the project throw her wallet at me. It was part of the project, but gee, I really felt homeless.
Then the best part.
I decided to take a shower. I know that doesn't sound too odd or anything, but wait. So I'm soaping up my body and everything, then suddenly I'm falling and I feel and watch myself as I fall and I'm think "humm, this is odd, I"m falling. I've never fallen in the shower before". Which is true. I never have fallen in the shower before. I fall every where else, but never in the shower. Anway, so then I hit my chin on the edge of the tub, because its a tub-shower. That hurts a lot, but mostly its my head that hurts. Really, its my brain that hurts, my whole brain. So I just sat there waiting for my brain to stop hurting. I think I bruised my whole damn brain. I guessed you'd call that a concution(how do you spell it?). So after the pain in my head fades enough to think, I was worried that my teeth were broken. So I check them and they're fine, but my jaw still really, really hurts, so maybe my jaw bone is broken. I very carefully feel up and down for any cracks or whatever, then open and close my mouth a few times. Nope, the jaw bone is fine. What a relief. I guess I'll just have a really big bruise tomorrow. So I finish rinsing off the soap quickly, because I thought I should get out of the shower in case I fall again. So as I'm standing in front of the mirror, drying off, I notice there is blood on my chin. I look at it closer and see that I am cut. I finish drying off and get a second, hand held mirror to see under my chin better. When I look into the double reflection I see that I have a really wide, really long gash across the underside of my chin. Being the calm ex-junior lifegaurd that I am, I take a closer look and decide I need stitches. So I go tape some gauze to my face and get dressed. As I'm putting on my shoes my roommate walks by and I casually mention to her "Oh, I'm going to go to the hospital. I think I need stitches." She gave me this look, like you won't believe. She was terrified and really concerned. Then I told her briefly what happened and she thought I should get the RA. What a good idea!. So I did. Anyway to make a tedious story shorter. I eventually got the RA on call and the campus transportation took us to the hospital. I had to wait a long time, but they soon stitched me up, like I thought they needed to, and I was on my way home to celebrate. I got five stitches. I've never had stitches before and I wish I had never experienced them, but what can you do? I'm suppose to go back on friday to get them out. I guess its good I'm not going home for Thanksgiving. I'm going to have 4 days to paint the city red, with my friends who aren't going home either.
So I did a lot of think about why I fell in the shower. I was trying to make it make sense. That didn't work. It will probably never make sense, but I do have a few interesing ideas. However, before I would like to say that I find my accident very funny. 19 year old girls are not suppose to fall in the shower, that's what old men do. Anyway, I'm lucky i didn't hurt myself any worse. So the logical reason I fell was that I most likely slipped on soap. Yet all the thinking I was doing lead me to another reason, not a physically reason, like the soap.
When I was small, actually for about as long as I can remember, and ever since, I have never believed that I was going to live for very long. I thought I would live to about 18 and then I would die in some tragic way. I always pictured I'd be run over by a car. Anyway, as I got older, mostly late in high school, I thought about the notion of my early death and was very distrubed that such a little girl would think like that. It's very creepy for someone so young to be so morbid. Must be why I'm a writer. Anyway, I lived through my 18th year and had basically forgotten about this morbid semi-preminition. However, when I was thinking about the fall and how much it sucked that I spent 4 hours of my birthday with someone I had never met before in a hospital getting stitches, I realized that I could have died that morning. I realized that I could have been knocked unconscious and drowned in the shower. That would have fullfilled my childhood belief. After this idea crossed my mind I was really careful for the rest of the day. I basically stayed in my room and attempted to focus on homework. I did go out to get food, but I was uber careful crossing the streets and I physically couldn't eat any hard food, so there wasn't a choking hazard. Now that I've lived through my 19th birthday I figured I'm good to live for a really long time. Nothing but my self-destructiveness is going to kill this old bird.
My day did improve that night. My friends brought me cake that they had made. It was really nice. I love them so much. Well, at least I'll remember this year's birthday. Its more than I can say about a lot of previous ones.